Don't We All Love A Bit Of Change

Now change, it happens, life happens. You'd be surprised how often things change around us, from the adverts you see to the new menus that get released. Change happens all the time but we sometimes have such a hard time adjusting to it. Whether it's moving house or moving out, to even starting a new job or college change is really such a weird thing. I didn't experience the change at first, well at least I didn't think so. What I notice now that I look back on moving out for uni, making new friends, and just my life now compared to 2-3 years ago. I realise that the actual change doesn't shock me and if anything I welcome it, but it's the anticipation that leads up to it and all the uncertainty that makes me wanna put everything on pause and hide. 

And it's natural, in fact most people feel like that but it can be such an isolating thing to feel. For me anyway, I am a big dweller. I worry a lot about what will happen and what I can and can't control, even since being young I've always been worried that I can't change things, but I can adjust to whatever happens. I panic most days about my future, I'm off into the big wide world and it terrifies me a little bit I won't lie. There's nothing set in stone for me at the moment and although that's great because it means I have so much choice and can really explore my options, it also means I have so much choice and this in itself can be largely overwhelming.

I want to do a blog post all about final year once I've graduated and wished my undergrad goodbye, the view I had at the beginning of the year is definitely different to now. There's some things in life we just can't plan or have much control of and this year has been a real eye opener for that. But in the same respect, it's allowed me to step back and realise how much control I do have in some situations. I've not touched on this and I know I have the post ready to hit send and publish one day, but 2018 was a pretty hard year and it really made me realise life isn't easy at all. 

And when stuff hits you it hits you all at once, but the beauty of all this is that I can take what's happened and how I've grown from it and carry on. I guess in life we all do just carry on to some extent. But with change, it can be a lot of adjusting and carrying on. 

Although the thought of change and graduating and having some career in order terrifies me. It also makes me quite excited to know it could all change, for all I know I could get a great opportunity tomorrow in my dream career and oh my I would love that. But there's also something nice in knowing I have a bit of wiggle room, to breathe and just remember that I will get a job and get into the career that I want at some point. Not everything has to be now.

With that in mind, am trying to look at my view of change more closely, I get so worked up over it I forget how great it can be to experience change. If anybody else gets like this let me know!

Until next time, Chloe!